Fall color

Two oddities about New England’s most glorious season: First, Rhode Island grows the biggest pumpkins in the world. Two years ago Ron Wallace of Greene set a world record with a 1,502-pound pumpkin. The results were made official at the Rhode Island Weigh-Off at a farm along the Kickemuit River in Warren - which means that the smallest town in the smallest county in the smallest state in the country hosted the world’s biggest gourd. Another Rhode Islander, Joe Jutras of North Scituate, shattered the record last year, weighing in with a 1,689-pound pumpkin at the Topsfield Fair in Massachusetts.

And this from a national telephone survey by Plow & Hearth: Among the questions asked: ‘What is your favorite fall foliage color?’

Red and orange led in preference (36 percent each) followed by yellow (14 percent) and brown (11 percent). Those living in the Midwest are most likely to choose red or orange (38 percent each), while North-Easterners are most likely to choose orange (44 percent). Those on the West Coast are most likely to like yellow (20 percent), and Southerners have the highest propensity to like brown (16 percent).

Veteran New England foliage seekers might prefer to choose more precisely among crimson, maroon, purple, rust, russet, copper, bronze, gold, raw umber and burnt sienna. The color is already peaking in parts of South County. Red maples and bright orange poison sumac are bursting from the swamps while the white ash blush a rusty maroon along the streams and uplands. Beech and quaking aspen, oak and sugar maple, hickory and black birch, tupelo and sassafras will add to the drama as the color hangs on deep into November in Rhode Island. Look for the Norway maples to make the final bugle call of autumn with a blast of brassy yellow.

Size Cliche Police

The blog has been sluggish lately, but we'll perk up a bit this week. First up: The latest "size of Rhode Island" catch. This one appeared in a blog entry by Stanley Fish on NYTimes.com. Titled "Buttons and Bows," the posting discussed the pros and cons of recent decisions in New York and Illinois to ban teachers from wearing political buttons or putting political bumper stickers on their cars.

He writes: "It is silly (and unconstitutional) to dictate what faculty members can put on their cars, especially at a state university like Illinois where the parking lots are the size of Rhode Island and the odds of a student knowing which car belongs to which professor are next to nothing."

So no Obama. No Nobama. No lipstick and pigs. No Women for Palin. No Women against Palin. No W with or without the line through it. My old Something's Bruin in Providence sticker is still good, though.

A fan's note

Some good fortune, some classic baseball and the Red Sox are moving on. Even Sox fans have to feel a pang of sympathy for the Los Angeles By Way of Orange County Southern California Angels of Anaheim, who defeated Boston eight out of nine times in the regular season but have lost 12 of the last 13 playoff games to the Carmine Hose. Ouch.

That point wasn’t lost on a Rhody member of Red Sox Nation living out in the Los Angeles By Way of Orange County Southern California Area of Anaheim. The following appears in a note from Jerry Crowe’s column in the Los Angeles By Way of Orange County Southern California Times of Anaheim:

Before Sunday night’s 12-inning marathon, it had been so long since the Angels defeated the Red Sox in a playoff game, reader Jerry Sondler of Warwick, R.I. notes, “Elena Sharapova was in her first trimester carrying daughter Maria.”

Cosmic Rhody

Digging deep into the online archives to discover an unusual size of Rhode Island reference. In a 2003 article about the construction of a cosmic ray detector in Argentina, the author uses a timeworn unit of measurement to prove once again that Rhode Island is the Universe.

Scientific theory can account for the sources of low- and medium-energy cosmic rays, but the origin of these rare high-energy cosmic rays remains a mystery. To identify the cosmic mechanisms that produce microscopic particles at macroscopic energy, the Pierre Auger collaboration is installing an array that will ultimately comprise 1,600 surface detectors in an area of the Argentine Pampa Amarilla the size of Rhode Island...

Located about 600 miles west of Buenos Aires, the first detectors are already working their soon-to-be Rhode Island-sized magic. Said Nobel Prize winner Jim Cronin of the University of Chicago: "These highest-energy cosmic rays are messengers from the extreme universe. They represent a great opportunity for discoveries."

Our interstellar readers will soon find out what Earthlings already know: Universes don't come more extreme than Rhode Island. It's such a given that we don't even bother to put "Discover Rhode Island" on our license plates anymore.

Lost in translation

Found this while blog-trolling during a post-deadline lull. It’s an 11-month-old posting by Dan Glaister of the British newspaper The Guardian. In his blog, Deadline USA, Glaister comments on the various ways Rhode Island is used to quantify swaths of wildfires in the U.S., adding that the dimensions are completely meaningless to anyone who isn’t American. His confusion is heightened when he discovers that nobody seems to agree how big (or small) Rhode Island really is.

P.S. Check out the comment by “Hammer Time.”

Middle of the Rhode

The good news: With the fifth and final category in the University of Cambridge study ranking American states by personality traits, Rhode Island no longer occupies the lowest rungs of the personality ladder. The bad news: We won’t be selling any T-shirts for ranking 28th in the category of “openness.”

Still, if we’re looking for positives from a study that has done nothing to elevate the self-esteem of Rhode Islanders, which is already below sea level, we achieved our strongest showing for being “curious, intellectual and creative.” Here’s the cultural profile:

Liberal values are often strong in states with a high openness rating; overall, people espouse more tolerant views on marijuana, abortion and gay marriage. Artistic and investigative occupations are popular; the arts, entertainment and computer industries are often strong. People prefer jobs that involve a high degree of abstract and creative thought. Rates of robbery and murder are often high, however. Conventional value systems, such as those enforced by religion, community or even the traditional family, are less popular than in other states.

The bottom line: Rhody should rank higher in this category. From its start, Rhode Island has been a tolerant and creative state. It was liberal before conservatives even discovered the word (and how to wield it like a bazooka to detonate debate before it starts). The role played by diverse religious and ethnic communities throughout our history is well documented (some of it even seeped into the Constitution). Through the generations, people here have found ways to retain their cultural heritage while simultaneously helping to create a distinct Rhode Island identity. As for traditional family values, well, that’s as subjective as judging diving. All I know is, it took a Rhode Islander to create “Family Guy.”

Survey says...

The appropriate Rhode Island response to Britain’s “Geography of Personality” study, ranking American states according to personality traits, would be our time-honored retort (and unofficial state motto): “You’re killing me.”

Yet another category that ranks Rhode Island near the dregs of the national neighborhood is “extroversion,” identifying a collective that is “sociable, energetic and enthusiastic.” Rhody nabbed the 40th spot, meaning it is only slightly more extroverted than Wyoming, Massachusetts, Montana, Oregon, Virginia, Idaho, Vermont, Washington, Alaska, New Hampshire and Maryland. Here’s the profile:

The strongest effect of a high extraversion rating is how much people socialize with others. Many people enjoy attending club meetings and spending time in bars. While outgoing and sociable, they are not necessarily friendly and warm – their socializing is probably more indiscriminate and not restricted to close friends. Large proportions of the population are employed in industries where social interaction is an essential aspect of working life, such as business (e.g.: sales) and healthcare (e.g.: nursing). Rates of robbery and murder are often high. People may tend to prefer in engaging in physical activities that involve other people, rather than exercising at home.

Hmm, that profile leaves Blog on the Half Shell stumped. If the strongest effect of high extraversion is socializing, wouldn’t a state that is 90 percent diner, pub, coffee shop and crowded beach rank higher? Almost everybody I know is an Elk or a Lion or a Rotarian. Some of my friends belong to the German-American Club, the Italian-American Club and the Portuguese-American Club – and they’re Irish! For night-crawlers, Providence is the biggest clubbing town in New England (even more diverse than Boston). The granges may be dead or dying, but socializing – whether with strangers or friends – is still ritualistic here. The only plausible theory is that when researchers polled Rhode Islanders on this topic, they were all at the casinos in Connecticut.